Wednesday, August 30, 2006!
HandWritten on; 11:36 PM
Ever since i reach my destination of target, I realised i have nv stopped suffering. I realise the amt of stress i m recieving, Cry aft cry, yet i cannot cry. Sometyms i feel noone actually feels that i m ard suffering and being end of my wits. Look! i m a 15 yr a kid. What 15 yr old. I m still 14! Ya... I m handling all sorts of problems, problems that only teachers or 5 yrs my senior at least will face this. I feel out cast. I feel sadden with my life sometyms. Sometyms i wonder if i have ever made a right decision. To say yes to joining the board, To u and others the prefectorial board is bullshit, is juz being teachers dogs. Call all u one, for all i care, If u tink i m a dog, What are u ? think first before u start blabbering ard with words,Words tt ar hurtful and strain. i juz wish for once my life would be swope with normal singapore kids. Not stressing things that are irrevelant to their life, Besides studies, i dun see what so stressful bout a student's life. If u tink ur life is stressful. What about mine?!! Have u ever considered mine? mine being so freking stressful! Freaking tired of the mess u made. u guys made, the mess of being irresponsible. For once. let me lean on something, I dun wan to be the pillar for u to lean on. Tell u what u have to do, we are born leaders, Maybe some born to be followers, but u gotta try before u give a direct no. Is this fair? i nv lyked making decisions. Does anyone realise, everytym tt i m made to have a speech or meeting or decisions! I can't! I cry till my eyes went red and swollon for 2 hrs. Did anyone asked?!! why must i be the one to go up to them and tel them what they are suppose to do. human doesn = to robot, I m so tired. Very tired of life. I m strain down mentally and physically try waking up at 5.30 tml when u will slp at 12 plus. I m loosing blood, do u noe that?! I worry for my own helath, i may not seem to care or show, but deep down i worry and cry in pain. Did u noe that?!
