Sunday, April 08, 2007!
HandWritten on; 12:40 AM
Yeah, i know its way pass my bedtime. Not that i have a specific bedtime hour. But yeah, i am suppose to be in bed now, tuition in the morning. Sigh.. Not that i have tuition tmr that is crap is that this head of mine has been giving me grave headaches which causes me to sleep and sleep. Than cause me to get angry with myself that i cldn do any productive activity for the day and it issn just the day is the past 2 days and if i include today is 3 days.
I know how using the computer in the night causes everyone's fearful nightmare - insomia. But i cldn care less about it. Not excatly cldn care less. But i really wanna talk to my boyfriend. Not that he is leaving me or something. But everytime i think about him. I am just fearful. Not that he is gonna betray me or sumthing. But.. I dunno.. Sigh. I guess i am getting over paranoid. How i wish i have a stone heart now.
Everytime when i think about him going to SP i know is his know school. Of course i must be happy for him, actually i am just intoxicated knowing that he got the grades he needed to go to his course and of course jubilant that he is starting his new semester. Somehow, this feels like a story i once played many years back with my barbie dolls. I know every girl will just worry about their guys. But i got nothing to worry issn't it. I mean he has never done anything of such to make me worry. Why do i worry so much. Sometimes i wish i could slap myself to stop this stupidity crap in me. I know i should relax and just concentrate on my studies and just trust him. Deep down my heart knows it.
Life has been going quite smoothly for me. Likewise the normal bitching around, of course not just people bitching about me. But me bitching. What can i say, I am a girl. LOLS!! Monday will be my last day of doing duty. My last day under ms lim control. Does this remove 50% of my stress?!! I really wonder.. I will definatly miss my juniors. Miss them being the sweetest people of my family in the sch. Thou the sch is really sucky but i know we will always stick together like glue and help 1 another.
Seeing dreams come thru just makes me feel that reality never existed
But reality makes things even worse when they come knocking on my door
For one thing i make sure, fairy tale do exist
The end. ---- 12.57 am.. will i still be awake?!
